La Realidad

In the context of the Casa and in conversation with Salvadorans, a quite common theme is ¨la realidad¨ of life in the El Salvador. I´ve been seeing some of this reality, but have been mostly numb to it... that is, until yesterday when we visited Las Nubes, a community of poor Salvadorans living on a volcano. The people we visited told of their sufferings, of the powerlessness, frustration, and despair that they feel. In Las Nubes, there is no running or potable water, no electricity, no doctors, and very little money. Family members get sick and die often, and when it doesn´t rain, there´s no water. Two families explained that they earn about $4.16 a day (altogether) for nine hours of work that may or may not be possible tomorrow. As we climbed the mountain, we were bitten by mosquitoes, attacked by fire ants (whose bites feel like fire!) and burned in the sun. Then the heavy rains came and we were soaked through. It was difficult to climb the mountain, to bear the bites & the rain. Standing near one of the families´ tiny huts (made of mud, bamboo, and tin) I couldn´t wait to get home, to put medicine on my bites, to take a shower to wash off the mud, to escape the pain that they shared with us. And I realized that for these people, there is no escape. No other place to run to, no showers, medicine, nor light when it´s dark outside. ¨La realidad¨ is just that- their everyday existence. For me, the 3 hour visit felt like too much to bear.

I came home feeling deeply sad, angry, confused, overwhelmed. I wanted to cry, to yell, to blame someone or something. Instead, I ate dinner with my classmates. Just before bed I remembered some advice from Dean Brackley, a Jesuit who gave us a welcome talk. He challenged us to fall in love with El Salvador and to let it break our hearts, to let it ¨ruin us for life.¨ He said that our moments of feeling powerlessness, heartbroken, of knowing deep despair are ¨privileged moments of grace,¨ that they are likely the closest we´ll get to understanding the feelings of the poor. He encouraged us to be present to and grateful for these moments, these treasures that are teaching us.

So, I am practicing compassion, letting my heart break. That is why I came here-- to deepen my compassion, to meet people I can´t forget, to break old patterns of shutting out suffering that I find difficult to bear. It hurts. And I am practicing.

¨May God break my heart so completely that the whole world falls in.¨ — Mother Teresa

First Impressions

Hola, amigos! I´m here in El Salvador, wondering how I can possibly express my experience of this place. I thought I´d share a few snapshots, mostly written, and one picture... it is our Casa group, my fellow students on our second day here. We live in 3 separate houses, all very close by and right near the Casa Office and Kevin & Trena´s (program directors) house.

MANGOES. They fall from the trees in Kevin & Trena´s yard, perfectly delicious treasures that are a wonderful welcome to this new place. I am planning a mago hunt as soon as I can find a basket to hold my loot!

COLORS. Bright, tropical colors adorn the houses, buses, clothes, billboards, and enviroment.

KIDS & ANIMALS. Trena and Kevin have 3 girls, with a 4th on the way! They are the most hyper, excited, bouncy kids I´ve ever met. Sophia is 9, Hannah is 7, and Grace is 4. Clare is due to arrive in October. They had a ¨Happy Days¨ bakesale to raise money for new pets. We all filled up on oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, lemonade, and pesto-tomato-mozzarella treats at the tune of just a quarter a peice. The very next day, they had a giant cage, 4 birds, and a bunny!

FOOD. Everywhere we go we are welcomed with food and open arms. This week we´re visiting all the Praxis sites where we´ll (in groups of 2-3) spend 20 hours a week learning from and with the people. Besides being spoiled by the wonderful Casa cooks, the people have welcomed us into their villages and homes with meals & treats fit for Salvadoran royalty. It is deeply humbling to be gifted so generously by those who live on so little.

WATER. My favorite place in El Salvador is a river near los Sitios where we spent the afternoon soaking and splashing with Salvadoran kids. I played ball with little ones who were undaunted by my very slow, confused Spanish while tiny fish kissed by legs. I sat in the middle of a tiny waterfall, getting a back massage from the flow... and then climbed to the top to jump in holding hands on the count of tres!

GOODNESS. I am surrounded by people, both American & Salvadoran, who are deeply committed to life as love, as compassion, as togetherness, oneness. I have landed in the middle of so much love... I am deeply grateful.

BLESSINGS. Everything I was worried about, every fear and upset has unfolded in a beautiful and better-than-I-could-have-imagined way. I am so well taken care of and I am deeply well

It´s dinnertime so I´m off, but will be back as soon as I can to give you more of this amazing place! I love you!

=)

New Address!

Welcome, my loves!

As of this Wednesday 8.19 (and until 12.16.09), I have a new mailing address!

Dawn Furfaro
Casa de la Solidaridad
A-179
Antiguo Cuscatlan
La Libertad
El Salvador, Central America

Feel free to send love anytime (though avoid sending your diamonds and treasures- I'm told they may not make it all the way to me!) =)